What Is Collaborative Divorce?

Collaborative divorce is an alternative to the traditional divorce process involving litigation. Collaborative Divorce is a voluntary, respectful process in which both spouses agree to work together — not against each other — to resolve issues connected to the end of the marriage. Instead of letting a judge or jury decide important matters, a couple meets with their respective attorneys and other neutral experts to negotiate solutions that reflect their specific goals, values, and circumstances.

Why Choose Collaboration Over Court?

Many people that come to my office are understandably not looking forward to the traditional divorce process. Going to court is stressful and time-consuming. It can also provide unexpected results and additional conflict.

I believe spouses going through a divorce often do better when they feel heard, honored, and supported. Collaborative divorce offers several benefits compared to traditional litigation, including the following:

• Privacy and respect. You preserve confidentiality because you're not in open court. No judge or court employee is going to judge you for something.
• Reduced emotional and financial cost. Collaboration tends to avoid the adversarial back-and-forth of long courtroom battles, helping reduce legal fees and emotional stress.
• Creative, tailored solutions. You and your spouse can design agreements that work for your unique family structure — finances, business interests, parenting, and more.
• Quicker resolution. Because the process is cooperative, it often progresses more efficiently and aligns better with your schedule and life commitments.
• Future-focused. Especially when children are involved, keeping communication constructive helps shape healthier post-divorce relationships.

How It Works

Here's how a collaborative case generally unfolds in my office:

• Agreement to Collaborate. Both spouses sign a collaborative participation agreement with their respective attorneys, committing to negotiate in good faith and not use litigation.
• Selection of Coaches and Experts. Neutral experts (financial, mental health, child/parenting, appraisals) are jointly selected. These professionals help with valuation, tax advice, emotional support, or parenting planning.
• Open Information Sharing. Rather than formal courtroom discovery (sending and requesting documents like financial statements), you voluntarily exchange documents and information to ensure fairness.
• Negotiation Meetings. Regular, structured meetings are held to work through issues — property division, business assets, child custody/visitation, support.
• Agreement and Settlement. If an agreement is reached, it's drafted by the attorneys, reviewed jointly, and turned into enforceable orders. If for any reason the process breaks down, litigation remains a fallback — but by choosing collaboration at the outset, you aim to avoid that.

Who It's For

Collaborative divorce isn't for every situation, but it generally works best when both people are committed to working together in good faith. If you and your spouse have agreed to divorce and are on amicable terms, it could be the best option for you.

Even if there is anger or resentment between the spouses, a collaborative approach could actually have the effect of turning down the temperature. When a couple enters the divorce knowing that it will require collaboration and thoughtfulness, it may change a person's mentality from "fight" to "cooperate."

A couple with complicated financial assets may benefit from a collaborative approach as well. In addition to the privacy one gets in this process, it also allows the attorneys to find experts that will put both spouses at ease and ensure a fair outcome. It also prevents expensive "battles of the experts" because everyone has agreed to use the same expert.

However, a collaborative divorce is not for everyone. You need to select the best method for your situation, which may sometimes be the traditional courtroom approach. A spouse more likely to hide assets or have other secrets would have a harder time getting away with such antics in litigation as opposed to a collaborative divorce. If there are substantial problems with mental health, violence, criminal behavior, or addiction, collaboration may not be a viable option. Because I offer both forms of divorce, I can guide you to what may work best in your case.

It is also important to note that, while collaboration is very often successful, if it does not progress and the case reverts to litigation status, new attorneys will be needed for each party.